tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32525792132797409662024-02-19T02:37:34.605-08:00Thoughts Along the JourneyMay He increase and I decrease...Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-18820023317117808322011-12-29T19:59:00.000-08:002011-12-29T19:59:07.619-08:00Equip, Encourage, ExhortFor the last few weeks, I have been struggling with a growing exhaustion and dissatisfaction in my role in our apartment ministry. We have been doing this for 7 years, and this last year we placed 10 new community teams, 7 at brand new partner properties, and 6 of those teams were placed just between October and December. <br />
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Some teams I have really enjoyed training, some I feel like I either have to call all the time because they won't check in and tell me how they are doing (and usually have the most challenging managers/clients) and others are constantly calling me. I have other teams who still haven't gotten to a point of success in their ministry, and I am continually trying to coach them to success. I can't say that it has been the most enjoyable season.<br />
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I have been faced with soul searching as to why I am feeling exhausted and dissatisfied. Much time has been spent in prayer, asking God to show me if it is my own heart issue, or something that requires a change of some sort, such as stepping away from the ministry.<br />
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I know part of it is that I am gifted as a "starter", and in my current role, much of what I do is not starting, but is maintaining the ministry. When working against your gifting, it can be really exhausting and discouraging. I do enjoy teaching, but I need to be more of a coach. This requires patience and lots of question asking. Not necessarily my strong suit. It is important that the new teams aren't made to feel that they are bothering me. That's part of my job. They need a coach.<br />
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Part of it is that we rarely have time off where we are completely free, this vacation included. I've had to check email every day, which has been lame. We are still looking for a new team for a current client, and I have had phone calls from new teams needing wisdom. Our entire leadership team is out of state, including us, and someone needs to be available. <br />
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On top of this, I long to spend much more time in our community, investing and spending time with the lost or new believers. I long to be "on the front lines" of ministry. I always encourage teams and others to involve non-believers in what they are doing. But for me to do that would be mostly inviting them to come watch me type emails, make phone calls or drive to meetings. Not so fun nor effective discipling. However, in writing that last sentence, I feel challenged that there must be something I can involve others in. (Note that we eat out 4 or more nights a week due to meetings with teams and/or accountability partners.)<br />
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Oh yes, one more thing...how do I raise a little boy, be an amazing wife, eat healthy, get exercise, and maintain all of the things for my own home?<br />
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Tonight, Eric and I talked about these things, which in itself allowed some release. However, he said something that made me think. He reminded me that we are called to <u><i><b style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #351c75;">equip, encourage, and exhort</span></b></i></u> the team members, which allows them to be reaching out to thousands of people. If we don't do this well, we will have 19 failing teams, meaning we are fully on the "front lines" of ministry. This was encouraging to me in many ways, and I feel like God is calling me to embrace those three words as a theme for this year. I also feel that God is exhorting me to not dwell on all of the downsides of leadership and to just focus on obedience to Him. Basically, just do it and quit complaining. If He desires for me to give up this role, he will make it clear.<br />
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Equip<br />
Encourage<br />
Exhort<br />
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The next step is to pray over, study the scriptures, and explore these three words this year. Would love your input on all of that. Will you join me?Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-10566157582469420322011-03-15T14:59:00.000-07:002011-03-15T14:59:52.657-07:00Cleaning with love...<a href="http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=3252579213279740966&postID=1056615758246942032" name="LETTER.BLOCK14"></a><br />
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<tr><td align="left" colspan="1" rowspan="1" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; color: #333333; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhI1eYM0QpI4H0NfB4p8mf3FeyzCwAvurcvn5xzrdJ-Q9R5DnjVJBewgYOH2UtqtuKvxs7jCWA0DRNExcZ-F_Ct8sMVf3zFb3QFc3cSzKBtSIkHo7ujfTc8sdvmykVzFnMwnMuQjRfnJVQ/s1600/cleaning+supplies.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="132" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhI1eYM0QpI4H0NfB4p8mf3FeyzCwAvurcvn5xzrdJ-Q9R5DnjVJBewgYOH2UtqtuKvxs7jCWA0DRNExcZ-F_Ct8sMVf3zFb3QFc3cSzKBtSIkHo7ujfTc8sdvmykVzFnMwnMuQjRfnJVQ/s200/cleaning+supplies.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div align="justify" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;">Do you have the same struggle as Eric and I do? Keeping our house clean for our own sanity seems almost impossible, and then the thought of a friend or neighbor dropping by without notice, just down right scary. Okay, maybe not scary, but on those days/weeks when you have been crazy busy, it can be embarrassing. Even putting in a work order can feel overwhelming. I don't want anyone to see my mess. But yet, when we do have people over, those are often the sweetest and most spiritually deep interactions. So my struggle is finding that balance.</span></div><div align="justify" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;"><br />
</span></div><div align="justify" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;">Another confession: Eric really struggles with feeling at peace when our home is messy. I dislike dirt, but can handle piles to some extent because I almost always know where it needs to go, but just haven't gotten around to putting it there. In our marriage, this has been the number one fight for us. I have come to realize just how much it means to my husband to come home and feel peace. It is now a much higher priority for me, although I still struggle with it on a daily basis. I understand his need much more now, and can clean even with love for him.</span></div><div align="justify" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;"><br />
</span></div><div align="justify" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;">My ultimate goal is that I want my house to be a place where people feel safe and comfortable; that it is a place of refuge. I also want my house to be a place of comfort, purpose and joy for my own family. Since I don't have any great answers besides Nike's famous slogan, "Just Do It", I am opening it up for you to share. Are there things that you are finding work well for you or for your family. </span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;"><b>My one tip to share with you this week: </b> I find when people are coming over on a regular basis, it is easier to keep up with the household tasks. Why? I think it's because knowing that someone will be here in a day means it is on my to do list as a priority. It's no longer something I can do tomorrow. In fact, we are thinking about reimplementing a set night for inviting friends over for dinner. Have you found this to be true for you?</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: white;">I'm looking forward to the dialog that comes from my vulnerability. So when you drop by, and it looks good, know that it was cleaned with love. If it doesn't, pray for me. :-)</span></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table>Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-90849808432071395642010-11-08T22:21:00.000-08:002010-11-08T22:21:38.684-08:00A New HomeSince my last post, I started searching online for new apartments. Our landlord still hadn't given us permission to stay with Bailey, and as I wrote, I was feeling restless. I didn't want to move to the same kind of "flat" apartment, so I started looking for town homes. I found a condo not too far away that had a great playground outside within our price range. Eric, in wanting me to be happy, gave in to my insane need to move on. So we moved...all within 5 days.<br />
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There is still so much work to do at the old place, but I am also doing my best to make this place feel like home. My need for change created an upheaval in Eric's realm that will be in turmoil until everything has a place here. He keeps stressing about where we will put everything, but I know we can make it work. It just looks different. I think that's fun. He was content, and I have created a hurricane. Now I am working hard every day to tackle more and more of each room so that it feels homey and settled. This feels to me like a way to show my love and gratitude to Eric.<br />
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If you didn't know it, Eric and I were born literally 17 days apart, but the kicker is that we had the same due date. I came 4 days early, and he refused to leave the womb. Okay, so it was only 13 days late. :-) God has put us together for a reason, and while sometimes I push us further than we need to go right then, sometimes it is my need to go that keeps us moving.<br />
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One really cool thing to realize since we moved is that God is truly at work at our old community. We have seen a couple of our friends turn back to the Lord, and other believers move in as well. An idea that God brought to mind was to gather all of these believers together next Monday and give them the vision for how to live at Edmonds Ridge. Please pray for us that it will be possible to gather them.<br />
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Also at the same time, my feeling that our home fellowship was just stagnant beyond repair until others feel ready to give God their lives, pushed Eric to have that conversation with them asking, "what do we want?". We all still want to gather, but now the two of us feel free to find/form another group with the purpose of truly worshiping as the Body of Christ. When we will find time to do both groups, I truly don't know. But I'm ok with dreaming and praying for the possibilities.<br />
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Lord, may I rest in you!Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-2440863463042784342010-10-20T21:49:00.000-07:002010-10-20T22:31:10.938-07:00I Don't Go Backwards Very WellIn all our years of marriage, I haven't really longed for a house. It seemed like it might be a good idea for when we retired. But in the here and now, we had planned to go overseas for missions. Our plans changed when God brought Apartment Life into our universe, and then even more when He gave Eric the vision for starting Community Northwest. We didn't know for how long God would have us doing this, so we just served with a "God will show us when we are done" attitude.<br /><br />As we served in Community Northwest, I felt the strong calling to be right in the trenches of living and serving in an apartment community. I would even say I prided myself on that fact. That is until about a year ago. Eric's parents started talking to us about the possibility of buying the house next door. At first I was completely opposed, but I came around fairly quickly as I saw Eric's excitement and the potential to fix up a house.<br /><br />It's a long story, but the quick version is that their neighbor passed away from cancer and had no living relatives. We kept waiting for months to see what would happen with the situation, whether the bank would be open to a short sale since we didn't want to pay as much as what he owed. Or if they would foreclose, and we could try to get it then. Nothing happened, and the bank wasn't even talking to the executor. So frustrating. So we decided to just wait and build up some nest egg savings.<br /><br />Then Bailey, our adopted dog popped into our lives. We aren't supposed to have pets here, so we knew we were/are putting the owner in a tough place. It's not like you can hide a dog. In looking for new apartments, I found the prices for houses in the area pretty reasonable. So that jump started an actual house search. We found two we loved with great potential, both foreclosed and both needing work.<br /><br />In the process, our nest egg savings kept getting used for car repairs, to the tune of $4000 in 3 months. :( So as we were trying to negotiate with the banks, we were asking them to cover any and everything that would require cash on hand. They weren't so interested in that.<br /><br />This last house that I had really come to love, was just priced a bit too high for us. We qualified, but were still bare bones in our savings and the monthly mortgage and other bills would be higher than we really wanted.<br /><br />To top it off, we restarted Financial Peace University last Sunday, and Dave Ramsey's first lesson is the need to have a 3 to 6 months emergency fund. Eric took that to heart. He really felt that to enter into something so big, we have got to build that emergency fund up.<br /><br />Hours and hours of researching, months of dreaming, a fun afternoon of looking at paint samples, watching HGTV for fun decorating ideas, and now we have to put that dream on hold. I feel devastated. I know he is right, but like I titled my post, I don't go backwards very well. I feel like I only know how to go forward...running. I push and push until I get my way. Pretty hard for Eric to feel at times as if he is truly the leader of our home. I know I need to follow him 100% in this, but I must confess, I've been throwing a bit of an inner tantrum/pity party inside my head all day<br /><br />The funny thing is that I never really had this dream of feeling settled before. In fact, even now I feel restless here at this apartment. I'm ready to move on. But to what? I thought it was a house. Now I don't know.<br /><br />Please pray that I will find my rest and peace in God wherever we live. The chorus of this new song by Audrey Assad has been running through my head for a couple of days now, and really resonates with my heart.<br /><br /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: separate; color: rgb(255, 255, 204); font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; orphans: 2; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px; font-family: georgia;font-family:'Times New Roman';font-size:85%;" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse;">And I'm restless, I'm restless<br />'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You<br />I'm restless, I'm restless<br />'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You<br />Oh God, I wanna rest in You</span></span><br /><br />My I truly seek out His peace, and not dwell on feeling restless!<br /><br /><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/N0B2ybZpDeM?fs=1&hl=en_US"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/N0B2ybZpDeM?fs=1&hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="385" width="480"></embed></object>Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-13304157797104378942009-01-02T10:58:00.000-08:002009-01-02T11:04:23.552-08:00The Sun is Out--Hallelujah!One of the few things I hate about winter is the dark gray "bleh" clouds that can stay for days. These are the kinds of clouds that are so dark, you wonder if it's still night when you wake up, and never brighten. After two days of that, I start to feel in a funk, and like I could just stay in bed all day. <br /><br />Today is the first day we actually have some sun, and I'm LOVING it! I need to see that sun shining through. <br /><br />That reminds me that in life, there are days when I can strongly feel God's presence, and others where it feels like He is hiding behind the "clouds" of life. I need to be reminded that He is still there in all His power, and I can still praise Him even though I don't see Him. God, may I never forget.Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-42540076274430220162008-12-06T12:37:00.001-08:002008-12-06T12:42:17.094-08:00Making Your Husband LaughThis is one of my favorite things in the world! Making Eric laugh when I make a comment makes my heart sing. It brings great joy to my heart and just yet again says "Yes, I have found the one!" I have found the one who "gets me." He is the one who makes me laugh, and maybe the only one who laughs at my jokes. He is the one who is thrilled when I walk in the door, and the one who thrills my heart when he walks in the door. It's like the other part of me has come home.<br /><br />Thank you, God, for giving me Eric!Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-59982802571453132122008-12-06T12:18:00.000-08:002008-12-06T12:32:48.907-08:00Keeping Up With Other Peoples BlogsI have a decent list of blogs that I subscribe to because I value them for some reason. Some blogs I read are just for fun or for hearing about my friends thoughts on life. I have linked to all the blogs that talk about Steven Curtis Chapman since his daughter's death. Others are for learning from stronger believers who are using their blogs to educate.<br /><br />If you were to give a guess, which ones do you think I am good at reading right away? If you guessed my friends', you would be correct. About equal to that are the SCC family blogs. I am discovering that they are a very cool family as a whole.<br /><br />Lastly, of course, are the ones written by those from whom I want to learn. I can't peruse those quickly. Some of them I want to take time to really read. But here's the problem. Their list keeps getting longer and longer, and begs the question, "How long will the list be before I sit down to read?". And will I ever take time to get caught up, or will I just eventually scan them quickly and jump to the next until I have "read" them all, and thus feel better about it.<br /><br />Pretty sure that writing on my own blog takes away from some of this time, but hey, I think after reading a few hundred other blogs, I deserve a break today. Don't you think so too? :-)Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-36103297934993536702008-10-13T21:42:00.000-07:002008-10-13T21:58:26.020-07:00The Seasons...Autumn has arrived!It's fall here in Seattle, which means beautiful changes of leaves, the immediate entering into cold weather and of course, the rain.<br /><br />There is a tree outside our office window...or may it's a bush. Regardless, it is something I look at often as I am thinking about stuff. A couple of weeks ago, I noticed that it was starting to turn beautiful shades of red and orange. Then we had some rain and wind, and within two days, the top layer of leaves was gone. I was actually quite sad because I wanted to watch the whole bush turn to red.<br /><br />Tonight we had quite a downpour, and I'm sad to think about what I might see outside my window tomorrow. How many more leaves will be gone?<br /><br />I'm sure that I could be profound and find some proverbial connection to the cycles of our life, but I'm not really in that kind of mood.<br /><br />One happy note from the rain...I've often passed people having to walk or wait for a bus during a downpour. I have often wished I was in the right lane to be able to lean out and pass them an umbrella that I had in my car. For a time, I had two sitting in my back seat. I live in Seattle, and while most Seattleites don't use umbrellas because we are rugged and strong people, we do have them available for those inexplicable downpours. I just happened to be extra prepared.<br /><br />Tonight I actually got to do it. My neighbor was walking to the mailbox at the other end of the building in a strong downpour. I was on my way to pick up Eric because he couldn't ride his bike in that kind of rain...no brakes when it's wet. I saw her, and rolled down my window. She gratefully excepted my umbrella. It was awesome! Sounds strange I'm sure, but I was thrilled to be able to serve someone in that way.Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-79812230593561851932008-09-25T22:38:00.000-07:002008-09-25T22:45:16.929-07:00Finding Financial PeaceWe have been fans of Dave Ramsey for awhile, but this fall we started taking his Financial Peace University. I just have to say I have really been enjoying it. Tomorrow Eric and I will sit down for our monthly budget meeting, and I am actually looking forward to it. <br /><br />I used to think that the denial was more freeing. But the weeks when we have been sitting down and doing our budget, I have actually felt more free because I'm not afraid that we are spending what we don't have. I'm more proactive in my shopping for groceries, and it just makes me think more before I grab that extra item that we don't actually need this week.<br /><br />Now hopefully we can start achieving these goals we have financially, pay down our debt and get on track. I'm loving the class because it is keeping us accountable to these needed steps.<br /><br />Go, Dave Ramsey!Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-76974236114142620122008-09-07T09:44:00.000-07:002008-09-07T11:20:25.854-07:00Hope!<p> </p><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Why are you downcast, O my soul? </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"> Why so disturbed within me? </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"> Put your hope in God, </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"> for I will yet praise him, </span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"> my Savior and my God.</span><br /><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);font-size:78%;" ><span style="font-weight: bold;">Psalm 43:5 (New International Version)</span></span><br /><br /><span id="en-NIV-30141" class="sup"></span><span style="font-style: italic;"></span><br />Some times you don't realize how you are missing hope in your life. It becomes the norm to focus on all that is attacking you or how all of your efforts seem to be failing. It becomes difficult to hope that things can change.<br /><br />Do you know how many times the word "hope" appears in the book of Job? Granted much of it is talking about hope being destroyed, but it was an important word even in the oldest book of the Bible.<br /><br />Last Sunday, my own hope in our little church finding life again after an up and down summer was definitely strengthened. Two of our friends had said they might look for other places to worship, and while we knew we weren't the reason they were looking elsewhere, it was still hard to hear. The rest of the group had move or wasn't solidly committed. So on Sunday, I was praying that God would give us direction. Should we start from scratch, or should we keep pushing on.<br /><br />Within a matter of 15 minutes, God gave me a vision for some new ideas. Three ideas to be exact. In fact, all three ideas had three of something in them. None were completely original as everyone in the church world has tried and/or is doing some of these things. What the excitement and hope comes from was that He gave me a vision for how to move OUR church into forward momentum. After talking with Eric, we decided it was exactly what we needed.<br /><br />Feeling excited and hopeful, I sent the email to the group to share the ideas, and included an invite to the first part...a First Friday Fun Night. We waited all week for a response. Finally I sent another email. "Did you get the email?", I asked. Immediately the emails came back, "We will be there." That night, everyone's response was so positive to all of it.<br /><br />Hope! I have hope! We have a future. We don't have to start from scratch yet again! I have to say hope feels great!!! Thank you, God, for your creative ideas! You are so faithful!<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.</span><br /><h3 style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="font-size:78%;">Hebrews 10:23 (New International Version)</span></h3>Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-72047525591751225952008-08-31T10:06:00.000-07:002008-08-31T21:17:24.393-07:00Update on FriendsJosiah has been making progress with his neighbor friends. The girls are now at times coming over to ask if he can play. And yes, a mom can make a difference. I've been trying to reach out to their mothers with my five words of Spanish. This seems to have made an impact on the little girls who are appreciating my efforts even though they have to translate for us. :-)<br /><br />Our older friend who is over more is still a challenge at times, but I've been able to help him with a few small things here and there. God keeps reminding me that I have a fantastic opportunity to help love and shape a young boy into all that God is desiring for him. My struggle is that my little boy thinks the sun rises and sets with his friend. This nine year old could get angry with him a million times over, and Josiah would never notice.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Lord, may my little boy open his arms to all and share your love with everyone in need.</span>Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-41066261049558681912008-08-20T18:56:00.000-07:002008-08-20T19:28:40.694-07:00Managing with GraceI have no idea how to manage others with grace. I keep asking God for wisdom, and I think I've learned a little over the years. I know I've made quite a few mistakes along the way, and I ache over those whom I have caused pain. I also ache over the lost opportunities for some that I avoided correction. Sounds weird, but I'm not the easiest person to love at times, and those who have been brave enough to correct me haven't always been the people I have cherished. In fact, I can think of at least two times of major correction that I look back at with deep pain, partly because of how it was done, but more because I needed to hear what they had to say.<br /><br />So far my best tool is to put myself in the other person's shoes. How have I felt when I've been reprimanded or been corrected? What was my relationship with that person, and did I walk away encouraged and strengthened or beaten and hurting?<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">My constant questions as a leader are: </span><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(102, 51, 0); font-weight: bold;">How can correct my teams without creating walls?</span><span style="font-weight: bold;"> </span> This is hard because we as humans struggle with being corrected. I know that I personally hate it, but just reading through Proverbs reminds me how important it is to take it in, sometimes even to seek it out from those you respect.<br /><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">How can I communicate the importance of things that need to be changed while still giving them ownership or stepping on toes? </span> </span>Sometimes the teams think what I am saying is just a suggestion and not a requirement. It's tough because our clients run a business. I think I'm learning to just come out and say..."It has to be done this way." My hardest struggle is when I'm helping the teams at events. It's very easy for me to just take over certain things when they seem unsure. I'm trying to learn to give suggestions.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(102, 51, 0); font-style: italic;">Can I be their friend and boss?</span><span style="font-style: italic;"> </span> I think to some extent, in this job, I have to be. While some may disagree, I think it makes correction easier to hear. My goal is that they know I've been there for them through good and bad, and they can fully trust me. However, I have also seen that our teams don't think of me as a friend like I would hope, which is sometimes very painful for me as I care so deeply about them.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(102, 51, 51); font-style: italic;">How can I keep our lines of communication open so they aren't afraid to come to me when they fail or when they have a problem with me?</span> Still working on this. Same struggle with parenting. If you know you are going to get in trouble, do you want to tell your mom what you did? Trying to help me teams realize that I am on their side and can help them navigate their way out of a mistake. I also try to encourage them that I've made mistakes and make them all the time. I probably have even made that mistake before. :-)<br /><br />The second part of that question is difficult. I know very few who enjoy confrontation, but I really want to know if I have done something to hurt my team members. I can't change or apologize for something I don't know. <br /><br /><br />There are more questions, but these are the ones that hit me tonight. <span style="font-style: italic;"><br /><br />Lord, give me wisdom. Help me to learn from how you teach, guide and discipline me.</span>Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-59275095662240698662008-08-17T19:32:00.000-07:002008-08-17T20:03:53.261-07:00Do You Want to Be My Friend?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiY4PcJvZ4d1BOSsYbS_IH2pGfgTzjQhWIOKr5NIXOv3J0RJl_jbdhT4K2U3G29zdY4QCoWxDUejYzMrlkzrl6hv-_iBV93sFgSpTHJ_BCEYW2fReEwVcihB6LRjAJDk4fpYvTSm3GdOr4/s1600-h/DSCN4441.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiY4PcJvZ4d1BOSsYbS_IH2pGfgTzjQhWIOKr5NIXOv3J0RJl_jbdhT4K2U3G29zdY4QCoWxDUejYzMrlkzrl6hv-_iBV93sFgSpTHJ_BCEYW2fReEwVcihB6LRjAJDk4fpYvTSm3GdOr4/s200/DSCN4441.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5235686388283137570" border="0" /></a><br />My sweet boy is one of the most social children I know. Maybe it's from being born into our ministry of hospitality or just his personality in general. He will invite anyone and everyone over to our house, especially if they are a kid.<br /><br />Since we moved to the new place, he gets very excited whenever he sees other kids. One such friend is a nine-year old boy who, being bored at home, comes over six out of seven days of the week. Mommy's patience with this friend is not always great, but I keep praying that God will show me how to love this little boy who seeks out our home as a safe refuge in spite of having to play with a three year old.<br /><br />The other side of the spectrum is four little Hispanic girls who live just a few apartments down. Josiah is thrilled when he sees them, and since he doesn't know their names, he just yells, "GIRLS! Hey, girls! You want to play with me?" as loud as he can.<br /><br />They are fickle in whether they want to play or not. Sometimes they are busy doing girl things, and run away from Josiah. One such time this week broke Mommy's heart. I could tell they weren't interested, but Josiah just wasn't getting the picture. Finally when they blatantly said "No, we don't want to play with you," he came running over to me crying. He just couldn't understand why they didn't want to play with him.<br /><br />Even the times they do say yes, they seem to have to be coaxed to play with Josiah. Not so, him. Maybe it's an age thing. I've seen him react that way to 2 year-olds, but he is often quite sweet and happy to play near babies and others.<br /><br />So my Mommy dilemma is how do I help him understand and yet not follow these patterns himself? I suppose helping him put his feelings into words and then reminding him of those feelings when others come around, is the best way. One side thing I'd like him to learn is how to speak Spanish. Most importantly, I want my boy to be one of the most loving, open and kind people ever. Maybe a good way to say it, is I want him to be Christ-like as he grows.<br /><br />If there are any parents who read this post and have ideas, please send them my way.Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-67992177685285294112008-08-05T10:51:00.000-07:002008-12-08T23:14:43.826-08:00A Beautiful Spot to Spend Time with God!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaXKczmJ46ZN_GQEnwY4fYYWgJIn7udZRirgbVqLo_26k_CCvRvTF2OXiETt6oAEGeBtjVmMCqNkvSxZernHcybTfILZ14-4JNC2sqGG3-E2V4T8pVllCB3HR8hVHzTNJ8KrI40AnYgas/s1600-h/DSCN3188.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaXKczmJ46ZN_GQEnwY4fYYWgJIn7udZRirgbVqLo_26k_CCvRvTF2OXiETt6oAEGeBtjVmMCqNkvSxZernHcybTfILZ14-4JNC2sqGG3-E2V4T8pVllCB3HR8hVHzTNJ8KrI40AnYgas/s320/DSCN3188.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231096019948031554" border="0" /></a>I just got back from dropping Josiah off at day camp, and I took advantage of our beautiful NW summer weather for some alone time with God. We live in Edmonds which is right on the Puget Sound (a salt water inlet). I went and sat on a bluff, which overlooks the water and faces the Olympic Mountain range on the other side of the water. To my right was the Edmonds Ferry dock and to my almost direct left, I could see all the way north to Mt. Baker. So beautiful!<br /><br />These pictures were taken a year ago on a special trip Josiah and I took to visit a new friend on the other side of the water.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigp4Dx3SM_0A1d51WFxq_mGWxhzE91QyfDa81GgpFXDf00fYNRDajZ7kpwKGxSjkK-ens5ep5L_DK3DgD3QT2sHYKt0VBnKmUe8GaEwQkFryzquV23rhzm5b1LUT9Jh-129IzRJ3PoNew/s1600-h/Seatle+MtRainer.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigp4Dx3SM_0A1d51WFxq_mGWxhzE91QyfDa81GgpFXDf00fYNRDajZ7kpwKGxSjkK-ens5ep5L_DK3DgD3QT2sHYKt0VBnKmUe8GaEwQkFryzquV23rhzm5b1LUT9Jh-129IzRJ3PoNew/s320/Seatle+MtRainer.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231095856775532306" border="0" /></a><br />In the background of these next two pictures, you can see Mt. Rainer hanging around in the clouds. Amazingly enough, it's about a 3 to 4 hour drive from us. I believe it's height is 14,000+ feet.<br /><br />Also, just above the hills on the left, you can make out the tips of some of the skyscrapers in downtown Seattle.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSqfMrcqGzxSuQo3VCL3JQlZpXadE6xtksWBHas2JgLrVy5JJxLx7Fextvn60x44jMs7Z3LcJwfSwARwAb2wPBDho9H9aYCVFjcmKN283oYnpOfw6ABzrVZSjNd2O-wAOzGVo29n5Lk4g/s1600-h/DSCN3178.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSqfMrcqGzxSuQo3VCL3JQlZpXadE6xtksWBHas2JgLrVy5JJxLx7Fextvn60x44jMs7Z3LcJwfSwARwAb2wPBDho9H9aYCVFjcmKN283oYnpOfw6ABzrVZSjNd2O-wAOzGVo29n5Lk4g/s320/DSCN3178.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231095327686725634" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggprUwbRECI8fZplc4KpcOuPD_xHwEAk3BGH9iABnnPU9xBeY5rAW8f2RZ26DQAL10QKysTCWw6g2zCQA083SsrqU1Es6dxxvquLIDllJc0W3cizF_hcorx6RDZYbCgh_Yr7hjMEO6qyc/s1600-h/DSCN3184.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggprUwbRECI8fZplc4KpcOuPD_xHwEAk3BGH9iABnnPU9xBeY5rAW8f2RZ26DQAL10QKysTCWw6g2zCQA083SsrqU1Es6dxxvquLIDllJc0W3cizF_hcorx6RDZYbCgh_Yr7hjMEO6qyc/s320/DSCN3184.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231095676641629698" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br />We are facing back towards Edmonds, and you can see the Cascade Mountain range in the far background. The boat is the other ferry that runs on the Edmonds to Kingston run.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiU8_ydDaGWJyuJdg_HaGn873J7dWhhAqd1Vhl600duMdSk68IbH9zmSQG4KVGi-bdVgw5Kq3gwbcDPGU4onMYl25ROQuuPM9W4B77t3jCUQIaqE2X50tFrKMAI2ns3-wNOM09O_gPgGKk/s1600-h/DSCN3185.JPG"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiU8_ydDaGWJyuJdg_HaGn873J7dWhhAqd1Vhl600duMdSk68IbH9zmSQG4KVGi-bdVgw5Kq3gwbcDPGU4onMYl25ROQuuPM9W4B77t3jCUQIaqE2X50tFrKMAI2ns3-wNOM09O_gPgGKk/s320/DSCN3185.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231095130048066162" border="0" /></a>The mountains in the background are the Olympic Mountain range on the Olympic Peninsula which separates us from the Pacific Ocean.Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-56223990105501843822008-08-03T17:45:00.000-07:002008-08-04T09:19:32.351-07:00Does God Sing?There is a chorus from a song on the radio that keeps running through my head..."Sing over me. Draw me close to rest in your peace. Sing over me, over me." At least that's how I remember the words.<br /><br />Yesterday in our church time, Eric read a passage in Psalms that talks about God singing over us.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);"><strong>Psalm 32</strong><br />Of David. A maskil. [</span><a title="See footnote a" href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2032;&version=31;#fen-NIV-14357a"><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">a</span></a><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">] </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);"></span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">1 Blessed is he </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">whose transgressions are forgiven, </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">whose sins are covered. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">2 Blessed is the man </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">whose sin the LORD does not count against him </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">and in whose spirit is no deceit. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">3 When I kept silent, </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">my bones wasted away </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">through my groaning all day long. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">4 For day and night </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">your hand was heavy upon me; </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">my strength was sapped </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">as in the heat of summer. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">Selah<br /></span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">5 Then I acknowledged my sin to you </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">and did not cover up my iniquity. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">I said, "I will confess </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">my transgressions to the LORD "— </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">and you forgave </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">the guilt of my sin. </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">Selah </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">6 Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">while you may be found; </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">surely when the mighty waters rise, </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">they will not reach him. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">7 You are my hiding place; </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">you will protect me from trouble </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">and <strong><em>surround me with songs of deliverance.</em></strong> </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">Selah </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">I will counsel you and watch over you. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">9 Do not be like the horse or the mule, </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">which have no understanding </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">but must be controlled by bit and bridle </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">or they will not come to you. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">10 Many are the woes of the wicked, </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">but the LORD's unfailing love </span><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">surrounds the man who trusts in him. </span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(102, 51, 51);">11 Rejoice in the LORD and be glad, you righteous;<br />sing, all you who are upright in heart!</span><br /><br />This such a beautiful Psalm, but I stopped listening when he read the line I've highlighted. There are more passages like this that talk of God singing over or for us. I've read them, but not really given it much thought.<br /><br />Today, however, I imagined it. I am learning much about God's love through being Josiah's mommy. And I realized that I love to sing songs to Josiah about him, for him, to make him laugh, to comfort him, even to put him to sleep. So if I am created in God's image, wouldn't He be the same? This passage talks about God singing songs of deliverance.<br /><br />Now, my next question is...What does God's singing voice sound like? Probably the most beautiful music I have or ever will hear.Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3252579213279740966.post-39528027072977355182008-08-03T16:39:00.000-07:002008-08-03T17:38:12.512-07:00Lessons in HumilityI was reading another blog this week, and the writer shared this Litany of Humility. God has been working with me on some of the very ideas mentioned in the litany for a very long time, but the way this prayer is worded feels more blunt than I have heard in a long time. I felt as if I had been hit with a 2' x 4'... a much needed one I might add.<br /><br /><span style="color:#663333;"><strong>The Litany of Humility by</strong> - Rafael Cardinal Merry del Val<br /><br />O Jesus, meek and humble of heart, hear me.<br /><br />From the desire of being esteemed,<br /><em>deliver me, Jesus.</em><br /><br />From the desire of being loved,<br />From the desire of being extolled,<br />From the desire of being honored,<br />From the desire of being praised,<br />From the desire of being preferred to others,<br />From the desire of being consulted,<br />From the desire of being approved,<br /><br />From the fear of being humiliated,<br /><em>deliver me, Jesus.</em><br />From the fear of being despised,<br />From the fear of suffering rebukes,<br />From the fear of being calumniated (slandered or gossiped about),<br />From the fear of being forgotten,<br />From the fear of being ridiculed,<br />From the fear of being wronged,<br />From the fear of being suspected,<br /><br />That others may be loved more than I,<br /><em>Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.</em><br />That others may be esteemed more than I,<br />That in the opinion of the world,<br />others may increase, and I may decrease,<br />That others may be chosen and I set aside,<br />That others may be praised and I unnoticed,<br />That others may be preferred to me in everything,<br />That others may become holier than I,<br />provided that I may become as holy as I should.<br /></span><br /><br />This is something I need to read everyday as I struggle with all of these thoughts...desires to be liked, to be approved of, to be loved and chosen. It is much more easy to desire these things for those whom I respect greatly, men and women of God. But what about people I deal with who don't always act with integrity or who have even treated me or others poorly or sought their own glory? Do I desire for them to be chosen over me? Don't I want Christ in my life to shine in a way that makes Him more desirable to those who don't have a relationship with Him?<br /><br />But that's just it! Humility can't be feigned. You can't be humble and wish for others to not receive glory. You can't be humble and wish that others will notice your humility. You can't be humble and hope that you will be noticed at all! These are all contradictory. And while it would be easy to think this can be mastered, how do you know when you've achieved a state of humility?<br /><br />There is so much truth in this litany that I can't even write all of my thoughts. I could literally write about every line and how I struggle with that very thing.<br /><br />My summary: Only by God's grace can we be delivered from our selfish ambitions, and that struggle for me is a daily battle. Lord, have mercy on me! Jesus, deliver me!Kimhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12923315312462432961noreply@blogger.com1